


Change for the Better

by Conservatoria



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, M/M, Pepsicola, john/vriska first - john/dave later I promise!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-07
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2017-12-25 19:22:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/956749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Conservatoria/pseuds/Conservatoria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John Egbert hears some things that he shouldn't and starts to get insecure of himself. When he meets Vriska that's when he starts changing for real.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What Just Happened?

**Author's Note:**

> I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing, just take this before I change my mind and won't publish it at all.  
> It's my first fanfic, sooo... uh yes.

Your name is John Egbert, and you need to calm the fuck down. 

You're 21 and a grown man, and grown men don't cry. Especially not because of some insults you heard your closest friends say about you behind your back. And it's not like your best friend was among them. It wasn't your best friend naming most of the most insulting things. Nope. It's not like that at all. And your eyes are definitly not tearing up!

Okay maybe it's a bit like that. And maybe your eyes have gone red from tears by now. But as the grown up man you are, you're not likely to admit it. 

God how pathetic are you?

As pathetic as your sickening love for Nicolas Cage, according to Dave Strider it seems.

Fuck.

You're not really sure if you should be really sad, or angry, or just plain dissappointed in your friends. But then again.. Thinking of what he said about Nicolas Cage you maybe, just kind of see his poi- What the hell are you even saying?! Nicolas Cage rocks ass, and there's no argument in the world to prove you wrong, Dave just doesn't have any sense of quality! 

Dave.

Your long time best friend. The best friend who's been there for you ever since you were ten. He and his brother had just moved to Washington when you met him. He tried to be the cool kid of the school, but you were certain that he was more than just a ”cool kid”. You had some bad experiences in school with some bullying which you couldn't stop, and then he was just fucking there defending you. You don't know why, but you started hanging out and were the best of friends ever since. He never seemed to have a problem with you. You were always together with him, playing games, climbing trees, whatever you guys did when you were ten. Dear god that was many years ago. Then your cousins Jade and Jake moved to Washington as well, and eventually you and Jade met Dave's half-sister Rose. They do live seperatly now though. But the 4 of you just clicked, and you met other friends too like Karkat and Kanaya.

But Dave was there from the very beginning. Which is why it hurt you so much hearing his words. They hadn't seen you, you're positive. They were standing in a circle, Dave, Jade (yes even your own cousin!), Rose, Kanaya, and Karkat. Talking about you. You had been over to Dave's apartment just last week doing the usual stuff. You played games, then he played some of his new music to you, his so called ”sick beats” (which was absolutely amazing, but you're not going to admit that now!) and then you had watched a movie (of his choice!).

So why was he insulting you as he did? It wasn't just your Nic Cage love he complained about. You'd rather not think about the things that were said during their conversation (because you might end up crying again, like the child you will forever be), but seriously though! You two were best friends! You trusted him! You thought that there was no secrets between the two of you, so why not just tell them personally to you instead?! 

God you feel angry and depressed at the same time. 

You think he mentioned your buck-teeth. Karkat compared them to horse-teeth if you were correct (personally you think that's about crossing the line, but what does it matter when a certain John Egbert is no where to be seen anyway?). 

As you're trying to process all of your thoughts you look up, just in time to see a streetpole right in front of you. Luckily you manage to evade it, before you walk into it. Not that it would matter, you're sure it'd just provide another detail for your friends to talk about when they're talking about your looks. The list contains, let's see.... Your wild untamable hair, your teeth, your oversized thick framed glasses, and your way too skinny figure? Yeah, you guess that sums it up pretty good. A black eye would just top it all off. 

You hurry your way around the streetpole to abscond, when you catch a glimpse of some strangers before you trying to contain their smiles, and breethy laughs. They're not doing a very good job. It must have looked stupid when you just evaded the metal pole, everyone else had already noticed. 

Suddenly words like ”dork”, ”idiot” and ”moron” shoots right through your mind, echoing voices of the people you trusted to be your friends. 

Fuck.

Are they right? Are you in reality just a moron? An oblivious moron at that! What do you know, they might just be around you out of pity. Shit, they probably are. They might even hate you, and maybe they were even talking about you out loud in hope that you'd overhear themm and leave them be. That might be the best idea. 

Would they miss you?

You are after all just an idiot hanging around them everyday. The idiot who can't take care of himself. The bullied one, and the cool kid had to stand up to you. He might have felt sorry, and then couldn't shake you off ever since. You called yourself the pranking master, but maybe they even just pretended to fall for your tricks, because they pitied you. You're the one who told them everything about your hopes and dreams, and they all listened to you, because.. well shit, probably out of pity!

You are the fool. It is you.

You're almost certain that you're about as useless to your friends as.. what.. Ice cream in the middle of a cold snowy winter, and holy fuck your metaphors are worse than Dave's and his alone are shitty enough! (ironic to him)

Maybe you are just useless?

That's the last words you think as you turn your key to your apartment. You sigh and decide that's most likely enough thinking for one night. You slide off your shoes and pull off your jacket letting it fall to the floor carelessly. You don't really care about messing your apartment up right now. You stride- no not that word, it's too close to something you'd rather forget right now. You walk casually (not really though) across your living room, until you reach your television. You start the first Ghostbusters movie, and with the theme sounding in your ears from the speakers, you make your way to the kitchen. You have started to get hungry, but you forgot to get groceries from the store it seems. You just hurried home after getting out of the park (where you had all planned to meet this evening, but then you overheard them and decided you didn't want to after all). The only thing you can find is.. Cup noodles. Welp that will have to do. 

5 minutes later you're on the couch, trying to enjoy some time alone. 

Then you feel your phone vibrating and your heart skips a beat at the familiar sound of someone pestering you. You almost lazily pull it out from you pocket to check, and of course!

TG: yo dude where are you

You realize that you've been so caught up in your thoughts, that you actually forgot to text them saying you couldn't come. An hour. And hour ago you heard them say those things about you.

EB: sorry, something came up at my dad's place and i have to help.  
EB: i'm sorry i forgot to write to you guys!

You kind of stare blankly at the screen, just waiting, waiting for his reply.

TG: it's cool

See. They don't care that you're not there, they're probably happy with it.

TG: everything alright  
EB: yeah, don't worry!  
EB: he needs my help because he's getting old, don't blame the man.

And now your a liar. A terrible one too. More to add to their list, how generous you've been.

TG: never said i did egbert  
TG: so you comin tomorrow right

He's... just asking that because he's pitying you. 

EB: yeah, i'll see you there!

That's the last message you send, before deciding to turn off your phone, tossing it lightly to the side so you can watch the rest of the movie in peace. You were all meating up again tomorrow at a small cafe you all knew very well. You're not really sure if you want to go anymore. Going there had always just been a thing for the six of you.

At the end of the credits of the movie, you slowly realize you haven't been paying attention since Dave pestered you. You sigh heavily. You're starting to get really frustrated with yourself here.

You reach forward to get the remote and turn off the tv, then you rise to go to the bathroom. You're feeling tired. It's still very early in th evening, but you feel like you could sleep immediatly. You're going to wash your face, to see if you can wake up a bit. 

Maybe you have been overreacting a bit? What if it was all just some kind of mistake? A big mistake. You shouldn't think too much on all these things before you're sure it's all true. You don't know why they said all those things about you, but you love your friends. You love your friends a lot. You don't know what to do without them. You pull of your glasses, and your vision goes from clear, to really blurry. You can see outlines of things and colors here and there, but your eyesight haven't been very good in the beginning anyway. You turn on the water to splash some in your face.

You catch a glimpse of your reflection in the mirror afterwards. And for a while you stand there looking at yourself taking deep breaths from the cold water against you skin. 

You sense the blue color of your eyes. And you wonder if contact lenses would be a good idea. You take a look down yourself and consider your clothes too. Maybe if you starting doing something about your looks, they would start to think a little better of you.

Then you put your glasses back in their place on your nose.

Your front teeth are not as bad as they were once! But you know that they're still a little big. You run a hand through the thick black unruly hair you have. It's a little wet in the front from having washed your face. But it refuses to lie down. You start to noctice small details about yourself. Things you don't really like. How big your glasses are compared to your face, and how long your hair in reality is. It's not combed or taken care of at all.

You never really thought of how you looked before. So why do you think so much about it now?  
Because your friends think about it apparently. Should you be concerned that your friends don't like your looks? Probably not, but you can't help but hating these details a bit. 

Yeah. You think you're going to change yourself a bit. How you're going to do that, you have no idea. But you're definitly giving it a shot. 

You'd rather change yourself to the better, than losing your friends. 

You change to get ready for bed. You still feel tired, and just decide that you might as well go to sleep, even though it's still early. You don't really feel like doing more tonight. You place your glasses on your nightstand beside your bed, before turning of the lights to climb under the covers. You look out your window, where the sky have just gone dark.

You could go for clothes tomorrow after meeting the others at the café. You smile a bit to yourself. Yeah, you're sure that everything is going to work out fine. Everything is gonna be alright.

And then you fall asleep.

________________________

You wake up slightly annoyed from the sunrays shining through your window, right at your face. This night's sleep have been fairly calm. You had some trouble waking up in the middle of the night, and it took you another hour to fall asleep again. But apart from that you slept through the night.

The first thing you think of is of course yesterday evening. You bury your face into the pillow growling slightly. You still don't know how to feel about showing up at the café today. You'd rather just sleep a few more hours, but looking at the clock on the nightstand besides your glasses, you're able to make out the numbers it's showing. And you're pretty sure it's time to get up. 

You pull yourself together and practically roll of your bed. You make your way to the bathroom, to take a bath and you first really wake up when the water hits your head. Then you dry yourself, and wrap the towel around your waist, before making your way back to your room. After retrieving your glasses, you open your closet. This is where it gets difficult. Cause you don't really have anything new to wear. It's all the same. Jeans, a little overused because you never really felt like buying new ones, since these were still in perfectly good condition (some of them had holes somewhere, but you didn't care. Kanaya did though). Then there was a bunch of t-shirts, mostly just plain, and sweatshirts in blue, grey and black colors. Now that you think about it you almost only have blue clothes. Odd. 

You settle with the only jeans you can find which don't look overused like the others do. A dark greyish, almost black pair. You pull them on, and luckily for you they still fit. You don't remember last time you were using these. At all actually. You throw on a random t-shirt, and pull on a dark blue sweatshirt. There's not really anything else for you to choose. You should definitly get new clothes. 

You go back to the bathroom and look yourself over in the mirror. Your mass of raven black hair catches your eye instantly, and you slightly pout for yourself. God damn it. There's no way you're going to control this mess you call hair. You try to comb through it properly, for the first time in years if you remember correctly. You gave up on controlling this shit load of mess a long time ago, but you could give it another try, you guess. Of course nothing works. You try to make it stand less out by flattening it with water, but somehow it only makes more strands stand from everywhere. It's slightly frustrating. You make a mental note to ask a stylist or something what the hell you can do about it. In fact, maybe you should just start out with a haircut. You pull some of your bangs down in front of your eyes and they go past your nose. You hadn't really realized how long it's gotten. Yeah. A haircut would do you good too. 

Your problem. You have no idea how to change these things. You're getting contactlenses for sure, but the whole changing your style thing is something you have no idea how to do. You know that Kanaya could have helped you through it in no time, both fixing your hair and your clothes. But you're not really sure you want HER to help you with this. You don't doubt her abilities at all, but you don't know if you should let any of your friends know this. You're kind of planning on just... well change a little bit every day and let them figure out for themselves or something. 

In reality you have no idea what you're doing. 

But before you know it an hour has passed, and you realize that you're running late. You hurry down to the kitchen to snatch some bread from the bread basket. You take it in your mouth while going out to pull your shoes on. Old grey ones. The weather seems warm enough at this moment to go out without your jacket, so you do. 

Even running some of the way you end up being 10 minutes late. You open the door to the café and smile, while exhaling deeply catching your breath. You wave to Feferi behind the counter and she smiles and waves back at you. You guys come here pretty often, so you know eachother pretty well. It's a very small café and there's not many who knows about this place, but it's nice and comfortable. The color of the café walls are a soft purple, and decorating in various purple hues. It's Rose's favorite color, so of course she likes this place a lot. 

Then you see them. Your friends at the table you usually sit at. Your smile is wide, and you wave to them, and Jade of course waves back as soon as she spots you, with a smile just as wide. It kind of runs in the family. 

You start walking towards them. That's when they all turn their heads to look at you. You slow down. You suddenly feel really uncomfortable. You feel judged. They're smiling at you (of course Dave and Karkat don't, the fuckers rarely smiles), but you still feel uneasy. You collect your thoughts and smile again, but this time hiding your teeth. You sit down besides Dave, and a cup of hot chocolate is pushed in front of you.

”I took the liberty of ordering for you.” says Kanaya from the other side of the table, with a smile.

”You know what I like after all, it's cool, thanks!” you just say back before taking the cup into your hands. 

They continue the conversation they had before you entered. It seems like Karkat and Jade was discussing something again, and it was not something Karkat was going to let go before he had made his point clear. You don't really talk as much as you're used to. They seem nice, exactly like they've always been, but maybe that's what makes you so uneasy? You don't really know why, but you can't help but feel that they're thinking something bad about whenever they look at you. They're nice to you, but then why did they say those things yesterday?

You don't want to ask. 

No, really, you don't. You sort of stare at the air in front of you, until you hear something. You can't really figure out what it is, at least not until Karkat is practically flailing his arm to get your attention. You blink a few times, before realization kicks in and you shake your head.

”Sorry, what??” you ask slightly confused. Karkat just looks even more pissed. 

”Are you fucking retarded!?” Oh lord, here we go.

”Are you seriousl-” his voice gets muffled from Kanaya's hand covering his mouth.

”I believe, what Karkat is trying to ask, is what you're thinking about John?” She asks politely as ever. So exactly how long were you just thinking to yourself? Come on John, seriously you're spacing out again, just say something!

”I'm sorry, I was just thinking” Yeah. Thanks for that information. Douche.

”Like, nothing at all, really! Just random things!” John, just stop. You're doing the thing where you get nervous and can't stop talking. So just stop it now before it gets worse, or they'll know something is up. 

They give you a weird look, but they let it slip. You mentally exhale, relieved, when they continue their talk. However you do not notice the way Dave looks at you behind his shades. Mainly because his shades are hard to see through. You do join in the conversation this time though. And it's like they haven't changed. You're actually a bit confused. You _know_ what you heard, you _know_ they said those things about you! So why do they act like this? You still really don't want to ask, because maybe you're just a fucking idiot or something. 

Jeez you're being a little hard on yourself here. 

Or are you?

Honestly you feel a bit confused. You do decide to push these thoughts in the back of your head for later. After one and a half hour, you decide to leave the place. Rose and Kanaya leave for their apartment they share together, while Karkat just waves before heading off to his own apartment in the opposite direction. Dave raises a fist, and you bump it, before you see his signature smirk.

”Talk to you later, all right?” and then he walks away as well. You catch yourself watching his back, wondering about the things he said. You want Dave to like you. He's your best friend, and you don't want to lose him. You feel like your chest tightens a bit, while still looking at him, and that must have lasted a while, because soon you realize Jade has been tapping your shoulder. Man you were really bad at paying attention today. 

You two start to walk together, since your apartments are in the same direction. She gives you a little concerned look from you side.

”Are you okay John? You have been.. silent today, it's kinda odd.” Her voice is soft, like it usually is when she is concerned about something, or when she is unsure of what to say. 

”Yeah, I'm good! Sorry I'm just a little tired.” You flash her a bright smile to reassure her of this. She gives a smile back, just as bright if not more. She seems relieved. That seems suspicious to you.

You small talk the rest of the way, and you actually manage to stay focused this time, instead of spacing out. You hug Jade goodbye, before she heads home as well, and you stand there alone on the pavement for a while. And you kind of feel alone. After just standing there a bit, you pull out your phone to look at the clock. Still only 2pm. You could always go to the mall. You know.. try and find some new clothes. 

You inhale deeply, before going to the nearest bus stop to get to the mall. 

You're doing this. You're making this happen.


	2. Get Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John Egbert gets lost in the mall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friendly reminder that I still have no idea what I'm doing. If characters do end up too much OOC apologies, I'm still working on my way of writing them.

You take a look around at the different shops around you. You have absolutely no idea where the hell you should start looking, or even what the hell to search for. Maybe you should seek Kanaya's advice after all. No! You said you wouldn't so you're not going to do that, you're going to do this without help from your friends! How fucking difficult can it be?

Apparently quite difficult after all.

You go into the nearest shop that doesn't look expensive. You have a budget after all. Your work as a waiter on a restaurant gives you enough to keep your small apartment, but not to buy fancy clothes like what Kanaya would probably want you to. You have been saving money for different things whenever you could though, so you do have something at least. The problem is what to spend them on. You spend what feels like hours in different shops, looking for something that might be.. well good enough. 

You're currently in the 5th store trying to find something fitting. You have looked at countless shirts and pants, still unsure of what exactly to search for. You sigh heavily, considering if you should just go home or something. You pull out a blue shirt to get a better look at it when you hear a voice right beside you.

”How about something that is not blue?” says an unfamiliar voice.

You turn your head only to look at a blackhaired girl by your side looking at clothes herself. Her hair reaches her waist, and she wears black pants which looks like they've been overused (kind of like your own pants, except her pants are SUPPOSED to look like that) a blue tank-top, with a black belt at her waist and a black jacket to complete her look. It was feminine and at the same time more... whatever to call it, you're not an expert on fashion, you only know that it looks good on her. 

You look around, but soon realize that you're the only one near her. You think she actually spoke to you. Wait, she was talking to you! Snap out of it! 

”Uh, what?” smooth John. Just smooth.

She rolls her eyes, and you notice that they're a blue color almost like your own, but a little lighter. She smiles before repeating what she just said. This time you grin at her before placing the shirt back where you took it from.

”Well alright, admitted I'm no expert on this honestly.” You scratch your neck a little bit. She's actually pretty. Why is she talking to you? There's a shit ton of people here and she's talking to you? 

”What are you searching for?” she asks. You only shrug a bit in response.  
”I don't know, I just need.. new clothes. That actually look good on me.” You look around a little hopelessly. Then you notice that she starts looking through some of the mens jackets near you, and you observe a little curious. She pulls out a green jacket and turns to you.

”You should try out this one.” She throws it to you, and you just manage to catch it before it hits the ground (come on, you were unprepared!) You look at her again and she smirks back at you. You don't really know what else to do, so you go along with it. You pull the jacket over your t-shirt and start to button it up.

”Oh wait!” she says while grabbing your wrists. ”Leave it open like that.” You unbutton it again, so it's open like she said. She takes a look at you, considering how it looks. Well you hope it looks okay. You don't need more people to think that you look absolutely ridiculous. 

”Alright just a second.” She starts fumbling with the sleeves on the jacket, rolling them up a bit before standing back again to see. You clear your throat.

”Ahem, so... I didn't really catch your name?” you have absolutely no idea who this person is. Still she seems to know what she's doing so you guess a little help wouldn't hurt, but then you would at least like to know her name!

”The name is Vriska. Vriska Serket.” She smirks again. The whole look seems to suit her really well. 

”John Egbert.” you reach a hand forward to shake her hand, but she just grabs your shoulders and turns you around ”Nice to meet you John, now let me see it from behind.” You let your hand fall back down to your side again as you try to look at her over your shoulder.

”You know this jacket suits you quite well. You should definitly try and go for other colors than just blue.” She places her hands at her hips, looking quite pleased with herself. ”I saw you when you entered this shop, and noticed that you didn't look for anything else than blue.” She rolls her eyes a bit.

”But blue is my favorite color!” you say a little defensivly.

”Really, is it now?” the sarcasm in her voice is really clear. ”Maybe it's time for you to get some other colors in!” You turn around to face her again, looking down at the jacket you're wearing.

”Come on, let me help you!” she says and before you know it, she's pulling you over to the dressing rooms. ”Stay right here, I'll be back.” then she's gone again. You're a little confused, but there's something about her that you kind of like. She soon returns with a black long sleeved shirt, and some pants in a dark blue color. She throws it in your arms, and push you back into one of the rooms ”Try this on!” then she closes the curtain. 

”Uhm, thank you. It's really not necessary for you to help me though.” yet you still do as she says, and pull the green jacket off to get the black shirt on. 

”Princess please, just let my awesome skills do the work.” you hear her voice say from the other side of the curtain. You smile at that sentence. Honestly you don't mind her help, since you were really lost before. She has a nice style too, so she might actually be able to do something about your looks. 

”Why do you want to help me though?” You pull on the black shirt, before unbuttoning your pants to change into the pair Vriska gave you.

”You look like you need it.”

Ouch. 

She's right though. 

”Oh.... thank you!” you button the new pants. How the hell did she actually manage to give you something that _fits_ you? She must really have sharp eyes, because these are the perfect size.

”Yeah, yeah don't mention it! Are you done yet?” she sounds impatient, even though you're not THAT slow. 

You push the curtain to the side so she can see the clothes. She looks for a while before stepping closer to correct whatever you have done wrong. She grabs the green jacket once again and hands it to you. 

”Here put this back on too.” You don't question her, you just do as she tells you to. After putting the jacket on, she pushes the black sleeves up your arms, until they're just below where the green jacket stops. She takes some steps back and smiles at her work, before lifting her hand and rotating her finger indicating that you should turn around. You do. You think she wants you to turn all the way around so she can see it all, but you stop halfway when you see yourself in the mirror. The clothes alone are almost enough to make you look like a whole new person! Okay not really yet, but almost! You admit it. It actually looks good on you. 

You hope that other people think that as well. Rose, Karkat, Jade, Kanaya (you hope that's stylish enough for her!)... Dave. You grin at yourself in the mirror, but only shortly. When you notice your teeth again you close your mouth to hide the smile, and just proceed to look at the clothes. 

You turn around to face Vriska again, smiling (no teeth remember!) but you just stare into nothing because she's gone again. Confused you look around after her ”Vriska?” that's when some other clothes come flying over your head, almost knocking your glasses off your nose.

”Looks cool, now try this on too!” You stand a little hopelessly with the clothes in your arms, looking miserable at her. She waves her hand ”Stop looking at me like that, there's a lot of clothes in this shop to try! And several other shops too. Get your ass moving!” she's just smiling at you. You scoff and shake your head a bit with a slight smile of amusement before returning to the room to try out the new clothes she fetched. 

You spend what feels like the next hour trying on different shirts, pants and jackets in different colors. Vriska helps you with different styles and it seems like no matter what she brings you, she can make it look good on you! Every time you look in the mirror, you actually feel a little confident again. While you two try to figure out what clothes you should buy, and what you shouldn't, you talk about your families and other small things like interests. You tell her about your dad, your sister and your hate for cake, and she tells you about her older sister, her mother and her love for spiders. You don't really know how she ended up loving spiders, most girls you've met freak out as soon as they see a small black spot on the floor or ceiling. 

You buy some of the clothes she found for you, including the green jacket. You two both agree that you could use something to drink, so you find a place where you can sit down and continue your talk. 

It's really nice. After getting over the confusion of why she wanted to help you, the two of you just talk. About pretty much anything. You decide that you really like Vriska. 

The fact that she's pretty too is a plus. And from the looks of it she definitly have style. She's rather enchanting really. 

While the two of you sit at a table with some cola to drink, you get to know eachother a bit more. She apparently has a small time jobs as a dancer together with a group. She says that they perform at different places for different occations. You can't dance to save your life. Apart from that you learn that she doesn't even live that far away from you. Some minutes by bus, and that's practically it. 

You subconsiously push some hair away from your eyes. Damn your hair was actually getting really long. 

”You know what you should do?” she asks from the opposite side of the table. You give her a questioning look.

”Get a haircut. Now that you have practically bought enough clothes for the rest of your life, you should do something about your hair. No offense, but it seems to be bothering you.” she just smirks. It's as if someone out there knew that you wanted to change your appearance and sent her to magically help you off your lazy fucking ass and do something about it. You shrug a bit, pulling slightly at some of your bangs to see how long it's actually gotten.

”Honestly I think that you could do practically _anything_ with my hair and it would still be this fucking mess.” She considers your words a bit.

”I haven't even been to a hairdresser for like... years. I gave up on this shit a long time ago.” She laughs a bit, before shaking her head.

”My hairdresser is good at things like that. Believe it or not, but the beautiful have I've got haven't always been like this!” she leans a little forward. ”I can give you the number. I'm sure he'll know what to do about your hair.”

You smile. You kind of forget hiding your teeth, but it doesn't matter right now. If you can actually get something done to your hair you would be more than a little happy. Maybe it means that you'd have to spend some extra time styling it, or whatever you have to do, but you'll do that. As long as something new happens, that hopefully can improve your looks. 

”Yeah, well... It's worth a shot!” You really appreciate that she helps you like this. She smiles at you. 

”Great. You're gonna look really attractive with a new haircut and the new clothes!” then she winks at you. Is your face getting hotter? You don't think so (shit it probably is) fuck it, she's an attractive woman, what can you say. 

Okay sure you just met her, but still, that doesn't make her less attractive. 

”What is the time?” she asks you. You look at her, suddenly pulled away from your thoughts ”uh..” (way to sound intelligent John) you reach for your cellphone checking the time. ”It's... 5-”

”Shit! Ugh I'm running late for an appointment.” She stands up, but before she goes she looks you into the eyes and smiles while pushing a piece of paper towards you on the table. You look down at it a little puzzled.

”Write to me John and let's figure out another time to hang out, shall we?” she winks again, and with a wave of her hand, she's turned around to leave. You pick up the small piece of paper and turn it, to discover something written on the otherside. 

_arachnidsGrip._

You quickly realize that she has given you her chumhandle. You shove the paper deep down your pocket to make sure that you won't lose it on your way home again. You sit for only 5 minutes more, before getting up yourself and collecting the bags of clothes you purchased. Yeah, you have a pretty good feeling about this.  
______________

When you got home and ate dinner, you spent some time just trying to relax a bit. It had been a long day after all, and you could feel that your feet were a little sore. Maybe that's because you don't move outside that much. Or.. sure you do, but not much of the time! Usually you stay home and play games, or watch movies or whatever. If you're out you're usually just hanging out with the others somewhere. Mostly at one of their apartments, or yours. On rare nights you're on a club watching and listening to Dave playing music. It's something you've always done. Whenever he was offered to play at the club, you would come and show your support. 

Just like he was there when you rarely performed with your piano music. You write some of your own songs. You don't really think that they're that great, but you have played them to an audience once in a while who seemed to like them. You appreciate that, because you've never really been confident in your music writing skills. 

You remember last time you had to do a performance. You were nervous, because shit, what if you'd fuck something up while playing? Just now it occurs to you that you probably looked like shit back then too. Dave was there though. Giving you a thumbs up from the audience, and you remember that you clearly felt more calm after that. And your performance went well there. 

_Dork. Idiot. His taste in music is horrible._

Voices of yesterday in your head. You wonder if he just came to silently laugh at you.

You sigh shaking the thoughts from your head. Stop it. Egbert you're changing now, so whatever was said about you before doesn't matter! What matters here is what they're going to think. Yes! You'll be changing, and you'll get fucking attractive and shit, and-fuck you need help for this. 

You sit down, turning on your laptop. You check your mail shortly before opening up pesterchum, to add another chumhandle. You slide you hand down your pocket to retrieve the paper Vriska gave you earlier. You bite your lip slightly when you can't find it. Turns out that you just had to search properly enough to find it. You sigh with relief looking at the chumhandle again, and then typing it into your computer.

The request you send gets accepted. You guess she's online right now.

EB: so uh... hey! is this vriska?  
AG: It sure is! And I can only guess that this is John, am I right?  
EB: the one and only!  
AG: ::::)  
AG: So did you manage to fit all of your awesome new clothes into your closet?  
EB: yeah, i did!  
EB: …  
EB: okay honestly i haven't even tried to fit it into my closet yet. also is that a smiley with eight eyes?  
AG: Yes it is, it's just something I do. I like the num8er 8ight!

Fair enough you can deal with that. Karkat has his own habit of only writing in capslock after all. It actually makes him seem even more agressive.

AG: So a8out that hairdresser. I can just take you there. It's not even far away from here.  
EB: you'd do that?  
AG: No, dum8ass, it's just something I'm saying!!!!!!!!

You bite your lip a bit, not sure if she actually means the dumbass part. Or if she means that sentence all in all. You're not sure if you know what sarcasm is anymore.

AG: Of course I'd do that! I don't mind. I enjoyed your company.  
EB: same!  
AG: ;:::)

Is she hitting on you? (shut up John)

AG: So when do you have time?  
EB: uh, as soon as possible!  
AG: So, do you have time Thursday?

Two days time. Yeah you think you can deal with that. You can manage to wait for two days.

EB: yeah, i have time there. i do have work later in the evening that day, but it shouldn't be a problem.  
AG: I'll see you there then!

You smile lightly at the thought. Imagine if someone were actually able to fucking do something about your hair. That would be amazing.

Then your computer screen lights up again, and you lose the smile, and feel your chest tightening uncomfortably again. 

TG: yo egbert

You hide your face in your hands a bit, before looking back up to answer.

EB: hi dave!  
EB: what's up?

You can't help the feeling in your chest. Every time you see his name appear on a text, you keep expecting a message from him telling you all the things he said behind your back, followed by a ”sorry i just cant handle pretending anymore” or something. It might be stupid, but there's nothing you can do to stop this feeling. Dave is important to you. He's a very close friend and has been for many years and you would not lose him for the world.

It takes him a little time to reply.

TG: just wonderin if you have time on saturday  
TG: to come over and play games or watch movies or some shit  
EB: actually i have work saturday evening.

 

You wonder if he might be relieved behind the screen. You wonder if he's just pretending to like you or something. Even though it doesn't really make sense! You can't imagine Dave of all people to pretend something like that. But that's why you're so confused. They all act like nothing has changed, and they talk to you like they did before. But you know what you heard. You were there. 

But you're kind of grateful. If you hadn't heard them say those things, you may never have changed your appearance. You could have been walking around looking like crap for the rest of your life.

Your eyes snap back to the screen to discover that he have answered.

TG: damnit friday then

You're free friday actually. You're lucky that you got those days off, since you often work weekend shifts at the restaurant. 

EB: i can deal with friday :B

You sure hope that he wants to spend time with you. Oh! You'll have your new haircut by then! You're still not sure of how it'll look or if it will even help on your looks, but hey you can always hope! You hope Dave will like your new hair and clothes at least then. You feel nervous about friday now though. And yet at the same time a little more excited than you're used to? 

TG: great im gonna make sure theres dorritos  
TG: just to be sure that the strider is under control while egbert is here  
EB: you're such a dork dave.

No he's not. Okay a bit, but compared to you he's still..... 

Cool. He's cool.

TG: ironically  
EB: riiiiiiiight, ironically!  
TG: shut it egbert

Okay let's not make him mad here.

EB: sorry!

Not that you think he's getting mad. You'd just really like to be sure he's not!

TG: so friday it is then  
EB: yup!  
TG: ill have to go now egbert try not to miss me

You roll your eyes a bit, smiling slightly, even though he can't see it.

EB: i'll see what i can do!

Yeah, you really care about your friends. And that's the reason you have to do something about yourself. It might be really good that you met Vriska. She clearly likes to help you out and it's good because then you don't have to invovle your friends, and or maybe cause them the trouble. 

You choose to close your computer after that. You sit with it on your lap for a while starting into the dark living room. It was getting late, and you hadn't turned on any lights, because you were to lazy to move. You sit and let your thoughts get to you once again. You seem to have been doing that a lot during the last two days. It's getting annoying, but it's hard to push them back in your head. Something just doesn't add up. Your friends act like nothing has happened, like nothing was wrong. They made you smile still and it seemed normal (except the weird feeling in your gut you get when Dave text you). But you can't ignore the words they said. Especially not now that you started to notice your flaws yourself. 

You stand up, putting your computer onto the coffee table in front of you, before going out to the bathroom, to clean yourself up before going to bed. You stare at the reflection in your mirror again. Slowly biting your lip, you proceed to notice things about your hair, or your body that you start feeling a bit insecure of. You lift a hand and slide it along your jaw, turning your head a bit to try and see your profile. It's difficult. You then slide your tounge over your front teeth, feeling yourself frowning at the look of them. God damnit. 

You take a step back and take a look down yourself. You heard them talk about how.. skinny you were. Maybe you should try and work out a bit. Just... you know.. shit that could take a little longer than just getting a haircut. Nevertheless it's worth a try. 

There's a lot of things to improve, other than your clothes. But you'll get there. 

You take a deep breath before smiling to your reflection. You'll get there. You know that you can. Before long they won't be talking about how terrible you look. 

Before long, you will have changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you feel that something will fuck up eventually? No? You should.


	3. This was better than you thought

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting haircuts are fun. Sorta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the slow update, I was stuck for a little while, but welp here the next chapter is.

Thursday came quicker than you had first assumed it would. You're not going to lie, you're actually looking forward to this haircut thing. You still have no idea what exactly you want to do with your hair. You had told Vriska this. Vriska had just told you to relax and let her take care of it. Apparently she had an idea of what your haircut should be. You're happy about that, because that saved you the trouble of trying to figure out what would look good yourself. Style and fashion weren't really something you were good at. She also told you that it wouldn't be that much of a change actually. You're kind of relieved by that too. Even though your hair was a mess, you liked having length. You didn't want it to be too short. It should definitly not be this length! Point is Vriska is helping you and you're grateful for that, since you clearly can't decide yourself. 

You're standing in front of your mirror, and giving your outfit a last judging look. The dark grey pants fits you well, together with a black t-shirt under the green jacket you had first tried on 2 days ago. You close your eyes and take a deep breath, thinking reassuring things to yourself. 

_You look fine John. It's okay._

You don't think it's okay. You don't feel good enough yet, and of course you know this is only the beginning. But you haven't been able to stop your thoughts the past few days. You go the same thoughts over and over again. The same memories of your friends words that evening. The same questions, and the same problems all over again. More than once every day from the mornings to the evenings. It's just like your mind won't let you rest. This has hit you harder than you thought it would. 

You smile slightly dragging yourself away from your mind. You finally turn away from the mirror deciding that it's good enough for now at least. You grab your keys and wallet before closing and locking the door behind you. Your hair is one black mess like it has always been. But that's okay, cause when you reach the end of this day your hair will look much better! You hope. 

You walk down the street, closing the jacket to keep the cold wind out. Thank god, the weather is still warm, but summer is nearing the end, meaning that there will soon be a lot of rain and cold days as the autumn draws near. 

You don't have to go far before you notice Vriska standing at the end of the road. You smile at the sight of her. You have only seen her in person once back at the mall, but you definitly recognize her. Hell you'd recognize her anywhere. She looks stylish again today, wearing dark blue pants and her short leather jacket. Her black hair is tied into a high ponytail, and laced dark boots cover her feet. You lift your hand to wave at her.

”Hey Vriska!” you call out, and her gaze goes to you immediatly. You weren't exactly keeping your voice low after all. You bite your lip a bit, worrying about being annoying to people and your hand quickly goes down to your side again, while you take a look around. There's not many people on the street anyway, so you relax once again. You look back at Vriska and you realize that she is smiling at you. You stop in front of her.

”Hey asshole!” She smirks and you notice the slightly dark lipstick she's wearing. ”Ready to get your hair fixed?” 

You scratch your neck a little nervously. You sure do put a lot of trust to this girl than you would like to admit, but hell. If it looks terrible your hair will grow back!

_Hopefully._

”Yeah I'm ready!” You get a glimpse of her blue eyes behind her silver framed glasses before she turns and starts walking down the pavement, and you just follow her since you're not sure where this hairdresser is located. 

”So-uh.. you look nice today!” You say just to have some conversation going. You're being really careful here. You have talked through pesterchum the past two days, but you're still worried that you're able to give off a wrong impression. You'd hate to fuck anything up. You don't need more people to hate you at this very moment.

She glances over her shoulder. ”Why thank you John! You-” she stops in the middle of her sentence, and you give her a confused look. She stops walking and turns to you, looking at your clothes. You find yourself biting your lip again, before she speaks up again ”Remind me to fix something when we get out of this cold wind alright?” then she starts walking again. You look down at yourself, wondering what exactly you did wrong. Ugh, what use is it changing your style if you don't know how to use it properly! Idiot John! Okay, look, everythings fine, Vriska is going to help you, she said she would. So just calm the fuck down. You look back at Vriska, her hair falling neatly down her back. Once again it had that messy, but still stylish kind of look. 

You can't really help feeling envious somehow. She's like Kanaya, she has a certain style that makes everyone on the street turn around to look at them. Her style is different than Kanaya's sure, but they both know what fits them the most. They know what to do with themselves to look amazing.

You trail after Vriska, looking down at your feet, almost dragging your feet over the pavement. You notice that you forgot to buy shoes. Dang it! Another time, right now there's something else you have to take care of. You also have to think about spending your money wisely, you can't keep up just buying things! You make a mental note to give it a small break, and just deal with what you have now. 

You follow her down a few small roads where you haven't really been before. Or at least it's not really something you remember. You've been around here a lot because of all the shops, but not these places. You didn't even know there were anything but apartments and houses there. When you go to shop for groceries, that's the only thing you do before heading back. Even though you've lived here for quite a while then there's still a lot of places you haven't seen yet. Surprisingly enough though, this place seems to be close to the café you and your friends go to every week. 

She stops infront of a small shop in the middle of the street. It looked like quite an old building, and not really anything special. And if it wasn't for the sign outside clearly stating that this was a hairdresser, he would never have guessed it would be here. 

”Here we are! The best hairdresser in town.” Vriska says, gesturing to the building in front of you. 

”Really? It doesn't look like much.” There's no windows from this side of the buildings at least, and it doesn't look like there's a lot of space in there. In honesty it doesn't look that impressive. 

”Not from the outside, it doesn't!” She grabs your wrist before opening the door and pulling you inside, and- shit. It actually looks kind of neat. The place is so much bigger on the inside. You look down at the floor covered with cream colored tiles, and the white walls make it look nice and spacy. One of the walls are almost covered completely in mirrors, with chairs in front of them. Purple chairs (which looks really, _really_ comfortable!). There are a few plants and other things to decorate the place, also in purple hues. 

You gotta give it to Vriska, the place was rather cool actually. Sure, it looked insanely boring on the outside, but it really looked professional. Suddenly you don't feel all too nervous anymore. 

Another quick look around the place tells you that the two of you are alone in here.

”Hey Eridan, get your ass out here!!” Vriska almost yells, most likely to be sure that this guy (Eridan..??) can hear her. 

”Have some patience would you?!” a slightly deep voice comes from behind the door at the back of the room. It opens, and then a rather tall man steps out in the room. He's wearing black pants and a black long sleeved shirt, and his blonde hair stands out nicely. It's clearly styled, and a purple streak covers the most of his hair in the front. Yeah, hair is definitly something he's very interested in, you can almost see this guy fussing over his hairstyle at least for two hours each morning. 

You're almost certain he does that. 

Vriska just grins at him. ”About time, you know I hate waiting!” You notice the other guy clearly rolling his eyes at her, before turning his look to you. You're not really sure, but he looks like he's kind of disguste-

”That's a fucking horrible haircut.” he says, and yeah, nope, you now _know_ he's disgusted. With your hair. (Wow way to be rude man). You notice that he has this kind of English accent. A little like Jake in fact. Seeing as Jake spent several years of his childhood in England you're not surprised that he got that accent.. You wonder if this guy comes from England, or perhaps somewhere near as well. 

”That's why I brought him here, since you are the best Eridan.” She says the last part almost teasingly, and Eridan scuffs at her before moving over to you. Not sure what to do, you stand completely still. You don't really know what to think of this guy, he seems like an asshole to you, but obviously he knows his shit when it comes to hair. 

He takes a good look to examine your hair closer, and is probably wondering what he should do with the mess. You hear a low hum from his throat and holy shit do you feel judged. You look at Vriska almost begging her to help you, or at least just do something to make you less uncomfortable. It's her friend after all! But she's just smiling, somehow reassuring to you, and you try to just let the guy do his work. After a minute or so, he turns to Vriska.

”And you said I could do practically anything with his hair?” he asks her. (Wait what?)

”Anything.” ( _ANYTHING?_ )

”So I'll get to do anything I want, and no one's even going to complain?” he looks sceptic.

”No one at all, I swear!” She holds one hand raised and the other to her heart, smiling mischievously. (Hold on!)

”Do I get to say something here??” you try, since Vriska seems to have planned it all already.

”No John, you don't.” she just shoots back, and you shut up. Alright. Fair enough then. Let the two ladies here decide what to do about your raven colored chaos. (If he gives up halfway and cuts you bald, you'll sue him.)

”Alright I think I know what to do with your hair. Sit down.” He gestures to one of the chairs and you comply. You let yourself sink down in the surprisingly soft chair, and lean back. You listen as Eridan starts to mess with some stuff, finding his scissors and a lot of other stuff you're not sure what is even for. You look at yourself in the mirror in front of you, and for a short while you lock eyes with Vriska in the reflection, standing behind you. She's just smiling confidently at you, and you redirect your gaze to anything else you can find in the mirror.

”Oh wait, I just got an idea!” you find yourself grabbing the chair surprised, as she turns your chair around, so you face away from the mirror. 

”What are you doing?” Eridan asks confused, while holding a pair of scissors in his hand. You look just as confused back at Vriska who just shrugs.

”Thought it would be interesting if he can't see what you're doing. Let him be surprised you know, show of your amazing work in the very end!” Oh, so in other words she's telling you to sit and wait anxiously for the end result? Yeah, okay you can do that you guess.

”Whatever you say Vris.” he answers, before walking behind you, spraying water in your hair. You squint your eyes shut as it was a little unexpected, but nevertheless you sit still. If anything, you don't want to mess up his 'amazing work' by moving at the wrong moment. 

You clench your fists at your side, as he tries to run a comb through your strands. And granted he runs into a few knots here and there. He's handling it nicely, as if your hair was some kind of precious artifact that he needed to treat with absolute care. Getting rid of the knots hurts a little bit, but it's not as bad as you expected and soon enough they're gone. 

With your hair wet, and completely combed through, you realize that your hair was so much longer than you first thought. You knew it was long, but jesus! Was it really that long time ago you last got a haircut?

Guess it was.

”Alright, and now you just sit still, unless you want me to cut your ear, hear me?” was he this rude to every costumer he got? In that case you're not surprised that there's not a lot of people who knows of this place. On the other hand, you've heard the way he and Vriska speak to eachother, and maybe he's only like this because your hers friend too? Well you consider yourself her friend at least!

You feel Eridan collect some of your hair in his hand. 

_This is it._

You close your eyes as he starts cutting. It feels like he is just as gentle with every strand, as he was when he combed your hair. At first you were a little uncertain if you could trust this guy. He looks so angry and bitter all the time, and he was rude. But you're starting to think that it's not bad letting him do this. He seems so passionate about it. Kind of like how you feel playing the piano. Even though you can't see exactly what it is he's doing, you can sense how carefully he examines his work. But even though you are fascinated about how he works, you're still a little nervous about the result. Most likely because you don't know what he is trying to do here.

You send a look to Vriska who has choosen to sit down and read a magazine, instead of watching. You don't blame her for that, it would be rather boring just watching you get your hair cut. You try to make the time pass by just watching the decorations in the room. You fiddle your fingers a bit and you're not going to lie here, but you have a hard time not moving for longer than a time span of 10 minutes. 

Sometimes you catch glimpses of Vriska looking your way, then she smiles a bit before returning to read. You feel a little uneasy at that since she seems amused in someway. And you're not sure if it's because of your hair, or just your reaction. You hope for the second option. 

You redirect your eyes to the floor and do your best to (try and) be patient. 

It feels like he's cutting half of your hair off.

…

He probably is, isn't he?

_Fuck_ , okay can you just get to see the result already?

”Almost done.” You hear him say as he puts down his scissors. Vriska puts away the magazine and gets up to take a closer look. A wide smile spreads over her face, so you can clearly see her white teeth behind her dark lips. For a second some of them almost appear sharp. 

You feel Eridan messing a little further with your hair, most likely trying to style it. You quickly close your eyes when he uses hairspray unexpectedly. You cough a bit from the strong fumes and you wave your hand in the air in front of you. He takes a step back to look at his work judgingly, and you watch him back. He leans forward to correct a few strands here and there before turning his back against you.

”All done.” (Thank fucking god).

”That was about time! Do you know how bored I was?” Vriska says, as she grabs onto the chair turning it around for you to face your reflection in the mirror on the wall.

_Please don't be bald, please don't be bald, please don't be-_

Wow. 

You stare a little baffled at your reflection. Heck was that even you? You're not entirely sure if it is. You're kind of amazed how much a haircut can do to your appearance. 

Your hair is definitly shorter than it was before. You'd say it migt be the same length as Jake's hair. The styling is a little different from his though and it doesn't look half as messy as it did before. There's no unwanted strands sticking up everywhere, it looks nice and straight and it's just so.. odd! You don't even know how he managed to tame your hair like that, you have tried about anything a long time ago! Or.. maybe not everything it seems. 

You smile at yourself as you turn your head to each side examining your hair from different angles. You've got to admit it actually looks good. You didn't expect anything like this at all. Vriska wasn't lying when she said this guy was good. 

It also seems like Vriska knows she was right, cause the smile doesn't fade from her face. 

”Well, what do you think, come on say something!” She swats her hand playfully at your head and you raise your hands in defense, as if you were scared that the slightest touch would fuck up the styling of your new haircut. You mean, what if it would go straight back to looking like bed hair?! Nope, not when it finally looks proper. 

”It looks really great, I.... I don't even know what to say. Thank you.” You look back at Eridan, who just frowns like he has done the whole time. He waves his hans dismissively growling slightly. You smile a bit thinking that he actually might be happy about that compliment. 

You get up from the chair and take a step closer to the mirror, watching yourself. Then you turn around to face Vriska and Eridan.

”How much?” of course refering to how much you owe him for this haircut. You hadn't even considered the price even once before now, but honestly you don't really care.

”Well, considering that your hair was so thick, and such a bitch to work with I'd say tha-” He get's cut off mid-sentence by Vriska clearing her throat.

”Are you forgetting something Eridaaaaaaaan~?” She sing-songs while leaning against his shoulder, grinning widely. This makes you raise your eyebrow curiously. 

”No Vris, I am pretty sure that I'm not forgetting a single thing.” He crosses his arms as she frowns at him.

”Oh yes you are! Do you remember the last time you and I went to a party together?” her smile is back on her face, and he groans turning away from her. You just stand watching them and not really sure what to do. 

”You. Owe. Me.” She's leaning her back against his, and he groans again hiding his eyes in the palm of his hand. 

”Fine! 5 bucks and we're clear.” He says then. Vriska moves away from him clearly satisfied. You're not entirely sure why she's even doing this? You were able to pay him the full price. You open your mouth to tell him that, but you get interrupted.

”Remind me never to play poker with you again.” he's almost snarling. You think he might be a bad loser. 

”I'm sorry that I am always that lucky!” She's just grinning, clearly not sorry at all.

”Lucky? Vris, there's a 100% chance that you were totally cheating! There's no way in hell that you could beat my Four of a Kind hand with a damned Royal Flush!”

”And how would I have been cheating, you were already keeping your eye on me exactly to make sure I wasn't!” 

”I don't know! You just did! There's no way you could have been that lucky.” She just shrugs and shakes her head.

”Nevertheless 5 bucks!” she says smiling brightly at you.

”It's not like a man have to live anyway.” You hear Eridan say behind her, and you really can't help but smile at them. Even though Eridan seems like a bitter asshole all the time, they appear as really good friends. You give him more than 5 bucks anyway. As an extra thanks. 

”Now, you got what you came here for. You got your haircut, and _you-_ ” he looks at Vriska with harsh eyes. ”-got your payment, so just get out of here already.” 

You smile and thank him once again before turning around to get to the door.

”Weeeeeeeell, you still owe for that one time back i-” you grab her wrist forcing her out the door, before they start arguing again. You're almost sure that you saw him smile before you closed the door behind you. 

She's laughing and in the end you can't help but chuckle slightly.

”How long have you known eachother?” you ask her as you walk down the street with her. 

”Since we were around 16. The jerk is the biggest asshole I know, but he's cool enough when you get to know him.” You do believe her. ”Besides that, he's fun to play things like poker with! I have probably ripped him from any hope of winning against me.” She looks really proud and you can't really blame her, winning is nice after all. 

”I don't think I mentioned it to you, but I am really lucky especially when it comes to games!” you shake your head in response.

”You haven't told me that yet, but I kind of got the feeling that Eridan has lost to you a lot.” You find that rather funny. 

”We should play poker sometime! I could gather some friends and then we could just play for a night.” 

”What with your luck?” You grin. It's been a while since you've ever tried poker though but you guess it can't hurt trying it once more. You don't usually like gambling away money but if it's just a one time thing then it should be fine. ”Vriska if what I heard in there was true, I'd be ripped from money already within ten minutes!”

”I'll promise to press my luck down!” She holds her hand against her chest and raises her other hand as a promising gesture. 

You roll your eyes and laugh a bit. You hesitate for a short while.

”Sure. Okay then.” You don't mind spending time with Vriska. She's cool and funny. She doesn't seem like she's annoyed by you either (like certain other people may or may not be???). But you have got to admit that you're a little nervous about these friends of hers? Sure. Eridan turned out to be okay you guess. You don't know him that well yet, but you can deal with him. But you're kind of scared of what impression you would give off. Dave's words still linger in the back of your mind, and oh god. 

You're meeting up with him tomorrow. 

_Tomorrow._

And your hair is styled now, but it won't be after you have slept. Shit you don't even know how to style your hair now. Dave is one of the reasons why you're changing your appearance after all and you suddenly feel really nervous about tomorrow and oh god, why are you even nervous about this?! It's Dave, he's the biggest dork you've ever met, and things are going to be fine. You're changing your looks, and you're minding your behavior so he's not going to be able to complain! Nope. 

You're probably going to have to confront him about his words one day.

But you won't do it now. You wouldn't even know how to begin and honestly you don't feel like it. You know that you shouldn't let your friends opinion affect your style, but it's not only about Dave's or Jade's or Karkat's opinion anymore. 

It's how it made you feel about yourself.

And you've felt quite shitty about yourself lately. And you're determined to change that. 

You snap right out of your thoughts at the same moment Vriska snaps her fingers in front of your eyes.

”Earth to John please?” you think she might have tried communicating with you. 

”Ah sorry, I spaced out.” you smile a little akwardly. You weren't really supposed to space out that moment. 

”I kind of figured.” She smiles lightly. ”Anyway, maybe I can get some friends over at my place tomorrow? Nothing beats poker a friday night!” 

You bite your lip slightly at that. ”Sorry Vriska, I can't. I already have a deal tomorrow.” You give her an apologizing look and she just shrugs.

”Alright, then we'll just find another day. What happens tomorrow?”

”Meeting up with Dave.” She nods a bit at that response.

”Ahh, your best 'bro' am I right?” you're sure that you mentioned your friends more than once when you talked at the mall, and a few more times talking to her over pesterchum. You think she got the point that Dave was your best friend, yeah. 

”That's the guy!” you smile brightly doing your best to hide your nervous thoughts from right before. 

”Hey Vriska can I ask you something?” you stop at the end of the road looking at her, and she turns to look at you as well.

”Shoot.” 

”Can you tell me... how to even style my hair like this?? I think you know better than I how to do that!” She starts to laugh and you feel heat rising to your face, but she still takes time to explain to you what to buy and use for your hair and how you're going to style it in the morning. 

You part ways after that. She asked if you wanted to hang out a bit longer, but even though you'd actually like that you had to decline her offer mainly because you have work later. 

When you went to the restaurant to work, you didn't expect to recieve as many positive compliments from your co-workers as you did. They stopped from working a few minutes to ask about it, smiling and telling you that it looked good. Nepeta stopped in the middle of the kitchen to give you thumbs up and a wide smile before rushing out the door to recieve new orders. 

Nepeta is the one who you talk most to at work. She's nice and energetic and really just a person you can't get mad at. Also she is cheerful and supports her friends. When she came back she added a lot of compliments, and honestly it made you really happy and relieved. 

You're not sure but you think that the costumers smiled more at you than before. Or maybe it's just your imagination but that doesn't matter. 

You feel tired and exhausted when you throw yourself onto your bed. It's not like it had been tough working tonight, but your shift lasted until the restaurant were closing. You leave your glasses on the night stand beside the bed and snuggle up in the covers, breathing silently. You think of the nice things people said about your hair and you decide that, okay, getting compliments like that for once in your life is actually pretty nice.

Then you drift off to sleep.


	4. You'll mess it up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took much longer to get done than I originally planned, apologies, I'll try harder next time.

Your name is John Egbert, and you're not panicking. Nope, not the slightest.

You're only a little frustrated because of your hair, which is quite the mess at the very moment, after having tossed and turned in your bed the whole night. You had of course hoped that your hair wouldn't take such damage during your sleep, but oh how wrong you were! You're currently staring hopelessy in the mirror, at your hair which is... disgusting, as Eridan would clearly have implied by now if he were here. 

Yeah, you can almost hear him bitch about how you could have ruined his masterpiece in one night only. And now you're wondering why you are even upset about this, holy shit hair can be fixed, will you just pull yourself together already?! You sigh heavily, running a hand through your hair. When did you even start to care this much about your hair? No, wait, you actually have the answer to that one, never mind. 

You strip out of your night clothes and let it fall to the floor, before pushing it aside with one foot. You turn on the hot water, deciding that a bath can make you calm down, and then you can start over. There's still a few hours before you were to meet up with Dave at his apartment anyway. You close your eyes and exhale slowly as soon as you feel the hot water on your skin. You wash yourself (your hair twice) before turning off the water, stepping out, and then you dry yourself off. You wrap the towel tightly around your waist, and leave your hair to airdry. You place your glasses back on your face, and well.. as long as your hair is still wet, it's not completely terrible. 

You make your way to the bedroom, and open your closet to find something to wear. After a few minutes you realize that you're taking an awefully lot of time to decide what you have to wear, and you remind yourself that it's ju _ST DAVE._ Alright, fine, you have to show him that you don't always look terrible! You grab a grey t-shirt and a blue checkered shirt to go with it, along with a pair of black jeans. You figure that'll have to do, and then hope that it's good enough for that cool ”kid” you like to call your best friend. 

You change into the outfit quickly, and go to the nearest mirror to see how it looks. You turn slightly to look at yourself from different angles. You smile lightly to your reflection, deciding that it doesn't look that bad. You turn to look in the direction of the living room, when you hear the familiar sound of someone pestering you on your phone. You drop down on your couch before grabbing your phone from the table in front of you, and then lean back to check the message. 

The blue text is getting rather familiar. 

AG: Hey John!  
AG: Soooooooo, how does your hair look today? :::;)

The way she types is getting familiar as well. 

EB: oh, well, you know..  
EB: just as cool as yesterday!

You pause a little bit, before typing out again.

EB: okay, no, it doesn't look anything like yesterday.  
EB: yet at least!  
AG: Oh John it's not that hard to style hair you know!  
EB: you wouldn't know! you know how to deal with hair, i don't. i've never had to style it!  
AG: You're taking this w8y to seriously John.  
EB: ugh, i know.   
AG: What's the deal about you wanting to change your looks like this, anyw8y?

You bite your lip a bit. 

EB: i just thought it was time for a change.

You haven't told Vriska why exactly you want to change your appearance, and you don't really feel the need to either. You haven't known her for that long anyway, there's not really any reason for you to ramble on about your personal problems with your friends. That's something you'd rather keep to yourself also. You're convinced that you can take care of this yourself just fine, so there's no need to drag others into it either. But you still really appreciate her help.

AG: Aha, 8ut stop freaking out! It'll 8e fine. Jeez.  
EB: alright, alright, got it.  
AG: Good ::::)  
AG: You're sure you're not up to pl8ying poker tonight?  
EB: yeah, sorry, but i'm still having that deal with dave you know  
AG: Oh, come on! Live the wild life for once!!!!!!!!

You smile and roll your eyes even though she's not able to see it. 

EB: another time! really! i promise that i'll play with you and your friends.  
AG: Alright, fine! Another time then, and soon!  
EB: yeah, soon i promise! but i'll have to go, i still have some things to do before leaving.  
AG: L8ter loser :::;)

And by ”things to do” of course you mean trying to fix that mess of a chaos you call your hair. You're determined, but pretty sure that it'll take you a while to figure out how to even do this. You place your phone back into the table and sigh a bit before getting up from the couch again. 

Now just stop whining about not knowing how to do this! Just do it, and if it looks terrible, then-... then you'll do it better next time! Yeah, so stop being such a bitch about this, and just fucking try. 

When your hair is dry, you make your way to the bathroom again to see what you could do to style it. You got something from Eridan to help you, hairspray, you think. 

You spend half an hour (actually almost a complete hour, to be honest) messing around with the locks of your hair, trying to get it to look like how it was yesterday.

When did you become such a girl?

In the end you end up with a result that is acceptable. It's not as neatly done as what Eridan can do, but you guess it's not that bad either. You step back and take a good look at yourself, and decide that this will be good enough. 

_Wait_ , when did you start to feel like this was some kind of date?

No, honestly though, it's just some bro time with Dave, and yet you've been running around, thinking of what is best to wear, and what the hell to do with your hair. You honestly feel like you're preparing for an important date. 

You guess this is rather important to _you_ though.

You choose to leave it like this, and go back to the living room to make some time pass by. An hour later you realize that you're running late, and then you're quickly out the door, walking down the street. You're speeding up a bit so you won't arrive way too late. You're happy that Dave doesn't live very far away from you either. Around 20 minutes or so, actually, so you might only be like 5 minutes late.

The closer you start to get to his apartment, the more you feel your chest tightening. You try to convince yourself that all of this is no big deal at all, but your mind keeps reminding you of the things he said almost a week ago. You take a deep breath, telling yourself that you've got this!  
You make your way up the stairs, and stop in front of his door, staring at it for a little while and while biting your lip slightly (a habit you have when you either think too much, or feel nervous about something) you knock on his door. 

You wait patiently and before you know it, he's standing there in a deep red shirt, and a pair of black jeans, shades glued to his face like ever. You wish he'd take them off at least once in a while. 

You know the color of his eyes. You saw them once back in 7th grade after having fought him (for the fun of it, of course) and his shades had been knocked off his face for a few seconds. He was a little startled at the time, but he quickly replaced them again. But back then you had already noticed the red color, even though you hadn't been able to look at them properly.

You had assured him that you didn't mind at all, but he still kept his shades plastered to his face every waking hour of the day. And night, you're sure.

”It's not nice to keep a lady waiting Egbert.” you sense a hint of a smirk at his mouth.

You sigh deeply. ”How late was I this time?”

”7 minutes.” He says as he turns his back against you and walk back into his living room. 

You check the clock on your cellphone, and shit he's right. Exactly 7 minutes. You know that he's never bothered by you being late (which you actually tend to be pretty often), but Dave has this fucking weird ability to always know what the time is. The little shit doesn't even need a clock or anything, he just knows! When you were smaller and discovered this you always tested him about it, and everytime you asked what the time was, then he always had the right answer. You don't know how he does it, and apparently neither does he. He just shrugs and says that he's guessing, but he sure as fuck is good at guessing then. 

Always knowing what time it is, doesn't prevent _him_ from being late either though, really the dude couldn't give less fucks.

You walk into his apartment and close the door behind you, before removing your shoes. You remove your jacket from your shoulders and go to join him in the living room. You find him standing in the middle of the floor looking at you through his shades, without moving or anything. You shift a bit where you stand and glace to the floor, knitting your brows slightly.

”What is it?” you don't really like the way he's just looking at you.

”Got a haircut?” he then asks and you perk up a bit. For a short time you had actually forgotten about this whole new haircut deal! You start getting slightly anxious again, but smile nevertheless to play it off.

”Yeah, I thought it might be time to get something done you know. My hair was getting rather long.” You pause for a moment, considering if you should say something else, but - 

”It looks cool.” he then says. You perk up at his comment, smiling a little wider as you feel a little relieved. 

”Thanks!” you watch him as he sits down on the couch, and you go to join him. Little by little the anxious feeling in your chest settles down. This might not be as bad as you thought it would be. 

He doesn't comment on your new clothes, and you didn't expect him to, unless it would be out of the pure irony. I mean why would he? Pft, (even though you'd actually like to know what he thinks) you don't need to know his thoughts _exactly_ on this. God you feel so pathetic, but he commented on your hair, and better yet he didn't even say shit like 'hey you look like crap' like you know he usually would. 

You hear him clear his throat and you look to him, waiting for him to say something.

”So what do you want to do?” you think about it for a while before shrugging your shoulders a bit.

”Play a game? You should have plenty of those right?”

”Well, what do you take me for Egbert?”

_Some god?_

What kind of stray thought was that?

”Some asshole.” you smile, but you're still cautious about grinning too widely and show your teeth. 

”I'm not even going to deny that one, that would be a waste of time.” He moves from the couch to go to a shelf standing against the wall near the tv.

”So, Egbert, what do you feel like playing?” 

”Supersmash Bros?” You shrug lightly. You are fully aware that he is better than you at this game, and you will probably get your ass kicked more times than you would like to count, but it's still fun and you have kicked his ass sometimes too! You're not completely terrible at it after all. 

He finds the game and puts it in the machine, before throwing one of the controllers to you. You flail a bit, but nevertheless manage to catch it. You swear that you see a smile tugging at the corner of his lips for a few seconds there, that bastard. He goes back to sit with you in the couch before starting up the game. 

”Do you still suck at this game?” He asks you from the side, and you scoff slightly.

”You'd wish, I have improved!”

”You say that everytime-”

”Ugh just pick your character already!” You roll your eyes at him. You don't know how he does it, but the dude always have some kind of comeback, and then it doesn't matter if it's a good or a bad comeback, he says it anyway. Actually it's like he always needs to have the last word no matter what, in any situation. Aside from Karkat, who rants a lot (you're pretty used to that), Dave is the one person who talks more than anyone else you know. Only for you guys though, he doesn't really communicate with people who are not his friends. But your little group know perfectly well how much this guy is capable of saying. 

Of course with Dave choosing Kirby (for ironic reasons he says) the game begins, and fuck if you know how it happened, but your character is flying of the screen in the matter of like.. a minute. You just started the game, and you're just starting to lose it already! You know he's sitting every night training for something like this only to prove that he's better at it than you, you just know it. 

And he is better than you.

You groan slightly from losing the first game. Dave just leans back in the couch looking pretty damn smug about his victory.

”Thought you told me you improved?”

”Smile all you can, cause you're not going to be as lucky in the next round!” He's probably rolling his eyes dramatically behind his shades or something. You can almost feel it. ”So bring it on!”

The next round of the game starts, and you're doing what you can to win. You're not bad at this game, it's just that he's apparently better than you. The longer into the match you get, the further your health is going down. You frown slightly until your gaze catches his leg almost right beside you. You grin, pranksters instinct taking over before you start kicking him teasingly to distract him.

”Whoah, hey no cut it off, no cheating Egbert.” He kicks you back and you laugh at him, almost losing concentration of the game.

_Did you know that when he's about to lose a game, he starts to cheat and distract you?_

The voice from that evening is way to clear in your head, and your grin fades away quickly. You quickly stop kicking at his leg, and as soon as you do he doesn't kick you bakc. You stare at the screen for a moment remembering Dave's words and only snap out of it when you lose the match again.

”I'll be damned.” you hear yourself say, and in a few seconds you have pulled yourself togetherenough to turn and look at him. ”Seems like I just can't beat you can I?” You pray that he didn't notice the fact that you wasn't really concentrated the last few minutes of that match. 

”No, I assumed that after all these years you would know it's impossible to beat me and you kn-” the more he says the less you are listening. Not because you wouldn't want to listen to Dave's rambling, but you just have a little difficulty with focusing right now. Which you shouldn't have, you should pull yourself together, and listen to what this guy has to say!

”-and therefore impossible.” he finishes. You just look at him a slight smile playing at your lips.

”What?” he then says and you just shake your head at him.

”Nothing.”

”I was rambling agan wasn't I?” You nod at his question, smile getting a little wider. He rises from the couch and moves towards the kitchen.

”Are you hungry?” he calls from the entrance, and you turn on the couch to look at him.

”What have you got?”

”Take-out pizza.”

”And why did I even ask.” You shake your head. You swear that the guy doesn't get anything else but take out food, unless he's visiting you at your fathers. Sometimes you've cooked something when he were at your apartment, but sometimes you're too lazy to do it. You can cook and you admit that you're pretty good at it. Not as good as your father though, he's the one who taught you how to cook anyway. 

You're not really a fan of take-out food, since you're used to your dad's cooking as well, but you agree to get some pizza nevertheless.

”Do you ever go out to buy some actual food?” You ask as you sit in the couch with each of your plates, and he just shakes his head.

”You are aware that it's more safe to release a fucking tiger in the middle of a store, than let me cook something right?”

”Riiight, I remember one time you tried making toast and all you got from it was practically coal.” You remember that clearly, he had completely forgotten about it while the two of you played games, and he didn't notice until you said you could smell something burning. So yeah, him cooking is probably not a good idea.  
”Yes, I'll leave the cooking to my mother, and by that I mean you... or your father.” Did he just call you a mother? Yeah, okay you and your dad have several times been fussing about what Dave and his bro eat. Jake has Dirk under control though, but still that doesn't make you a ”mother” type!

”Someone have to make sure that you get something else than take-out!”

”I'm doing fine _mother_. Even though I do appreciate a good meal once in a while.”

You straighten up, and run your hands down your shirt to get rid of wrinkles in the fabric to look presentable. 

”Have you remembered to brush your teeth this morning?” you ask, doing your best to sound concerned. The corner of his lips twitch up at that. 

”Yes mother.” he answers back, not once moving his eyes from the tv. (You think, it's still hard to tell from his shades.)

”You got proper breakfast?” 

”Yes mother.”

”Did you clean your room?”

”Yes mother.” (Well you know _that_ is a lie.)

”Did you change your underwear?” You almost think he lost it at that, but he manages to keep a straight face. He sighs heavly, clearly exaggerating the whole act, leaning back against the couch looking like he's giving up on life.

”Mom!” 

Ah yes, you're going to be a terrific fahter one day. You're going to wake your kids up early in the morning, even on the weekends, and keep asking these super annoying questions like 24/7 everyday, only to annoy them further. That's totally what parents do. Your father kept asking questions like these, making sure you always remembered doing it. As you got older, you reacted kind of like Dave does right now. 

”When were you last outside?” You cross your arms staring him down.

”When did _you_ last go outside?” he snaps back as part of the act. Touché. Except-

”Actually last Tuesday!” Achievement unlocked.

”Oh, is that so?” looking at you this time. You nod grinning widely for a second, before remembering _teeth_ and you tone it down a bit. 

”Yeah, and actually I got a new friend there.” Just to point it out.

”You did?” he actually looks a little curious now. ”Wow, you have other friends than us?” He sounds really sarcastic, but somewhere in the back of your mind, you wonder if it's supposed to be sarcastic. You punch him lightly on the arm, somehow half trying to punch harder than you did. You keep smiling though.

”Shut up! Her name's Vriska and she's actually really cool.”

”You haven't told us that.” And no, you hadn't told anyone else of Vriska yet. You planned to sometime, but you've only been around her like two times within this week, and chatted through pesterchum. And, once again, it's only been a week and you haven't really gotten around to tell any of the others about it. 

”Is she hot?” he smirks beside you before drinking some cola he brought with him to the living room. You just roll your eyes at that.

”Yeah she's pretty.”

”Getting a friend, and a pretty one, without help from anyone else, wow Egbert, I'm going to have to see that with my own eyes.” 

”Maybe you can meet her sometime.” you'd like that. Vriska is i big help to you, and she's nice and if her and your other friends could get along, you'd be happy about that. But before you're getting your friends to like Vriska, you should get them to like you first. Yeah.

After that conversation you pick up on playing some games again. The rest of the evening goes exactly as other times you've been at Dave's, except you have to refrain from doing all sorts of things, like laughing too loudly or stop yourself from pulling some kind of prank on him when he's not looking. You feel rather sad about it actually, but you know that he doesn't like that you do those things, so you won't. 

Sometimes there's the two of you screaming at eachother because the other was winning at mario kart and you would laugh together. In other moments of the evening there is silence, and you can't help but get uneasy whenever that happens. You feel slightly anxious about it, fighting in your mind to find something to say to him. Maybe it's just you, but whenever the silence lasts too long you fear that he's thinking about.. well you. Thinking about that you might still be annoying, or stupid and you fear that he just considers throwing you out. 

But he doesn't.

You're grateful for that, you'd hate to get thrown out by your best friend because you were being obnoxious or for some other reason.

You think you might be thinking too much about this. That's another reason you hate when silence falls in between you. You can't help it.

You wonder if he feels as awkward as you do.

Of course, you're sure that even though he might be feeling awkward, he's still cool enough to play it off as if nothing's wrong. At the same time you fear he might know when you start feeling uneasy. And you might be a little jealous of his ability to hide his emotions in situations like this. The only way you know when Dave Strider is nervous or upset is when he speaks with his Texan accent. Being his best friend for years, you couldn't help but notice that the few times you've seen him lose his cool. But he's good at hiding his emotions nevertheless, it takes a lot for Dave to crack his pokerface. 

Later you grab your phone to check on the clock.

”It's half past ten. 22:36 if you want to be precise.” he says beside you, smirk tugging at the side of his mouth. He knows he's right. 

Dang it! How the hell does he do it? 

”Don't even ask me how I know, it's been a mystery for years Egbert.” Uh-oh. Why can he read your thoughts like that? Dave, get out of there! You bite your lower lip slightly, a little worried what else he might know. Does he know how uncomfortable you are right now? 

You move from your spot on the couch to stand up and stretch a bit.

”I should be going home.” He sits up straight from his slouched position on the couch.

”What now?” You chuckle, nodding at him.

”Yeah Dave, now.” _Before you fuck things up. One step at the time._  
”I have some things to get done at home.” _You're not going to push your friends away by fucking things up. You refuse._

”Alright then, if you say so.” he shrugs his shoulders. 

_You'll become the best fucking friend there is, and they won't have to pretend anymore._

You nod with a smile and wave at him.

”I'll see you later Dave!” You go for the door, and you hear him get up from the couch to follow you out. You grab your jacket, quickly throwing it over your shoulder before you smile a last time at Dave. He has already opened the door. Curse him and his flashstepping or whatever the Striders call it. You take a step forward, and somehow stuble out the door when your foot gets caught at the doorstep. You hear him laugh and you feel your face heat up in embarrasment and you refrain from looking at him. You just wave, saying a last goodbye before absconding down the hallway towards the stairs. 

When you reach the pavement below, you release a breath you didn't know you were holding. Well that sure went well, you're pretty sure that he thinks you're even more of an idiot _now_ than you were before! You smack your hand against your face, then grimace since you smacked a little harder than you meant to.

Jesus Christ. You know that you should just confront him already about this whole thing going on in your mind. 

But you don't. 

And you won't do it. Because honestly, you're scared of the truth. You're really scared what he'd say to you, scared that he'll just admit it all to you and then leave you behind. You don't want that. You want to keep your friends, so you're just going to have to suck it up, and do something about this mess that is you. 

You'll just have to do it better next time. If there will be a next time.


	5. See the change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry. I was kinda giving up on this, but I thought that why not give it a shot again. I'm sorry for the delay but thanks for all the kind comments!

You're in your bedroom, sitting by your keyboard. Your fingers are brushing the keys playing the different notes in slow steady melodies. Some soft, others more powerful, giving off a certain feeling to the music you play. You pause for several moments, picking up a pen to scribble some notes down on the sheet papers in front of you. You often sit down to just play some music, either songs well known, or you compose something yourself. 

Usually you just play whatever you feel coming to you, but sometimes you write down some of the things you're composing. Like you are now. And some of it is rather neat you at least think. You have a habit of not ever really finishing your songs, which frustrates you a bit since you'd like to actually finish them before starting on new ones. But whenever you just sit and play like this, a lot of other melodies come to your mind and you feel the need to write them down first before you might forget them. 

So in reality you just have a bunch of sheet papers with unfinished songs on them. 

That doesn't mean you enjoy doing it less. You don't really plan on doing anything specific with your songs. The last time you played a small concert on the piano, was just covers of other songs and melodies anyway. You don't think you'll get to show off what you can make yourself, and you're fine with that. 

Even though you do enjoy making songs like this. And you really wouldn't mind playing your original music to other people. You'd like to see them hear your music and smile because it makes them happy. 

You put the pen down checking the notes you've hastily written on the paper. You move your fingers down on the keyboard again playing it again to listen to it for a while. You lose yourself in the sound for a great deal of time longer, closing your eyes just feeling the keys beneath your hands. You've played piano long enough to feel it instead of watching what you're doing. A light smile spreads on your face to the soft, and yet a little sad tune. 

Until of course you hear something that doesn't really fit in. 

You open your eyes once again looking down at the keyboard playing the last few notes over again, and no matter what you do there's something off about the last bit. No way, fuck this. You try at least 10 times more, trying to figure out why it won't fit in, and what note would be better. You change the rythm several times, try to use various notes, try it out on another octave, shit whatever you could manage to think of, but it just stays off. 

You release a supressed sigh before giving up reaching a hand up under your glasses to rub the bridge of your nose. You grab you glasses to pull them off and slightly squint your eyes looking at them. Everything suddenly became one big blur. Your sight is good enough for you to see what's in front of you, but you can't really make out any details. 

You sit there for a while observing how everything looks without your glasses to clear it all up. You then decide that you're actually really tired of wearing glasses! You've gotten used to them through many years of wearing them, but now they annoy you a bit. First of all because, well, your friends don't like them. _Dave_ doesn't like them. They hide your eyes, and practically your whole face, and they don't help you look less nerdy together with those front teeth you're sporting. If you run they can fall off. If you fall they might break. You also remember some bully back in highschool punching you in the face breaking your glasses once. They fog up on cold days, and there are many of those here. When the days are hot and you start sweating they glide down your nose. Oh, that's another thing, you constantly have to push them back on their rightful place on the bridge of your nose whenever you even look down.

You do realize that these are small things that shouldn't really bother you. But now they do. And you might as well do something about it!

You then push your chair back to rise from your seat, and move to get your laptop. You start it up opening pesterchum as soon as it's ready. 

You sit down on your bed with the machine placed on your thighs. You smile seeing Vriska online. Just the person you needed to talk to. After the others figured out you had met Vriska, they demanded they got to meet her soon. You don't know why they were fussing that much about it, but they apparently really wanted to meet her. Jade especially had seemed really enthustiastic about it, but she's always like that so you were hardly surprised.

You open up a chat to text her.

EB: hi vriska!  
AG: Hey John.  
EB: i was wondering about something..  
AG: Yeah? Speak up, what is it?  
EB: you're using contacts sometimes aren't you?

That's what you're assuming at least since you saw her with glasses the last time, but she wasn't wearing glasses the first time you met her. You're asking just in case.

AG: Yeah I do, they're kind of necessary when I perform you know.  
EB: i can imagine how difficult it must be dancing with glasses.

It's not ballroom dancing after all, as far as you've been told.

AG: Exactly.  
AG: So why are you asking?  
EB: well...  
EB: i'm getting rather sick of wearing glasses all the time to be honest.  
AG: Ah, so you're considering getting contacts????????  
EB: pretty much, yes.  
EB: but i've never used contacts before, i don't know how to use them!  
AG: So you're asking me for help ::::)  
EB: yes.  
AG: have you bought any contacts yet?  
EB: no i planned to go today since i have nothing better to do anyway.  
AG: I can go with you if you'd like?   
EB: that's actually what i hoped.  
AG: Don't worry John, I've helped you with everything else, I'll help you with this too :::;)  
EB: thanks vriska. 

You agree to meet the same place as last time you saw her in person. The two of you go into the nearest shop to get you contact lenses, and they tell you about how to use them, for how long they lasts etc. etc. They even ask you if you want them to help you, but you decline because you already feel nervous enough around strangers constantly thinking about your firsthand impression. Even though they're people you most likely won't meet again. 

You regret that.

”Do you want me to help you with those?” Vriska asks when you reach the point where you'd go your seperate ways. You bite your lip thinking about it for a while before nodding.

”Yeah. Yeah, I'd like you to help me, or at least just be there in case I need help!” 

”Well, I don't have much else to do for today anyway, so I won't mind.” she smiles at you, and you offer one back at her before pointing down the road leading to your apartment.

”Then I can also show you where I live!” You don't mind having her over, and you don't need to worry about your apartment being messed up, since your dad taught you since you were small that you should keep your place tidied up at all times. 

You keep the conversation up all the way back to your apartment. You don't feel nervous talking to Vriska, since she's helping you with all these things that bothers you. 

 

You retrieved your keys to the apartment from your pocket, quickly opening the door.

”Alright, so... my place is not the best, but hey it's home!” you like to consider yourself a proper gentleman, at least in situations like these, so you let Vriska go inside first.

She walks over the doorstep, while she pushes her jacket off her shoulders and takes a good look at the place. You step in and close the door behind you, before taking your shoes and jacket off. 

”Huh, this place seems rather nice..” you hear her say. You hold a hand out silently asking to take her jacket for her. She smiles to you and give you her jacket. ”Such a gentleman!” she smirks and you just grin back at her. Your dad taught you to be polite, so you guess it's only natural to do this. You hang up both jackets on the coatrack to your left and then pass her in the small hallway to reach the living room.

”So uhm, you can just sit down and make yourself comfortable!” you tell her before redirecting your gaze towards the dooropening leading to your small kitchen. ”Are you hungry, or thirsty or..?” you guess you are slightly nervous having her here, since you don't want to make any mistakes. 

”I'm fine thanks John, now just get out and try those lenses I want to see!” she chuckles while taking her seat in your couch. She's still looking around to examine your apartment further. Not that there is much to look at, you like to keep your place rather simple. Save for the mess in your own room, but she doens't have to see that!

You nod and hurry down to your bathroom to get to the nearest mirror. You stand there for a moment taking in how you look with your glasses perched on your nose. You then reach a hand up to get them off your face and place them on the sink. Your reflection is completely different now. Everything is still a blur, and therefore you have no clue whatsoever of how you look without your glasses. You sigh deeply, but nevertheless smile when you think about not having to use your glasses for much longer. 

But no one have told you how difficult getting contacts can be! How can some people just.. spend 2 seconds and then they're done? You've been fumbling with this for at least 10 minutes! You guess it's a matter of getting used to it, but still! 

An hour after, however, you manage to succeed. You're looking at yourself in the mirror, watching your eyes and you admit that you feel less annoyed now that the glasses have been removed from your face. You take a step back. Your eyes are still just getting used to the new feeling of the contacts, but it'll be over soon you're sure! You smile at yourself before going out the door, walking back into your living room to show Vriska your newest victory!

You don't say anything, but she still twists her upper body from the couch to get a look at you, since she could easily hear you come walking down the hallway. Her dark lips spread into a grin as she stands up. 

”Look at you! Almost as good as new huh?” She places her hands on her side, as if she had spent hours on a masterpiece finally done, and you smile shyly at her, scratching your neck.

”Does it look good enough?” You ask her, and she simply smiles at you. 

”Your eyes are brighter than I thought! No glasses suits you.”

You're honestly really relieved. You feel like your confidence is growing stonger with new clothes, haircut and now lenses. Wow, it's amazing how such things can actually improve how you think of yourself. The point is, you feel a lot better, you just need to get used to these lenses, and then you don't have to deal with annoying glasses anymore!

”Okay-” You hear Vriska start.

”You've got a haircut, nice new clothes and you can see without having to wear those thick rimmed distractions on your face! How about that pokernight with me and my friends, and possibly even a nice night at a club! Undoubtly you'll find a nice girl looking like _that_.” She gives you this certain look to go along with her smirk, and you're pretty sure that your face heats up a bit. For some odd reason your first thought goes right back to Dave.

”I'm not sure..” you don't really reach further on your 'argument' before Vriska is interrupting you yet again.

”Oh come on! It'll be fun! Just do this one thing with me, and I'll promise that you can go home the minute you start feeling uncomfortable! Just give it a shot would you? Pleeeeeeeease?” It seems almost wrong, the pleading look on her face. Probably because Vriska usually looks like a girl who gets everything she points at, the minute she want's it. Which kinda scares you, because she's beautiful and endearing enough to probably be able to manipulate any man out there. 

The pleading look works on you though.

“Alright.” You say as you roll your eyes, yet with a small amused smile on your lips. You raise on finger though before she gets to say anything.

“I'm going home though if I start to feel uncomfortable..” She just waves a dismissing hand.

“Yeah, yeah, how about this weekend?” She really wants you to go huh? Alright, you guess that it can't hurt and you're off this weekend anyway so- 

“Fine.” Oh god, you just agreed to go somewhere with a whole lot of people who can judge you and- NO stop. Stop, easy now who says they'll judge you? 

You think you might have been spacing out because you don't hear her, but soon Vriska has put her arm around her.

“I'll introduce you to all of them. They're cool persons, just like me, so you can look forward to it!”

_Shit._

“Alright, heh I can barely wait!”

_Shitshitshit._

“I have to go now, but I'll write to you later about it okay?” You're about to respond to her question, but before you do you feel her lips against your cheek.

_Oh._

She's out the door a long time before you gather your senses. Your hand goes to your cheek and you start to actually move. Okay that just happened. You're not exactly sure how you feel about that, it was just a small peck, but..

Fuck it.  
_______

Vriska does as she said she would and contacts you later in the evening. 

AG: Soooooooo, that poker night yes? :::;)  
EB: yeah?   
AG: I've contacted some of my friends and most of them are able to meet up at my place Saturday night! What do you say?

You think about it for a bit, considering if you really want to. But you then decide that, yeah! You want to!

EB: saturday sounds fine to me.   
AG: Gr8t!   
AG: You can go to my place at 7pm.  
AG: So what about those lenses, good enough?

You're really happy about the lenses, even though you had to take them out by now. You're now wearing your glasses again, wanting to take it easy while you get used to the feeling of something stuck against your eyes. You're about to answer her message, until you're disturbed by someone else. You switch the conversations to see who it is, and Jade's bright green text flashes on your screen. 

GG: jooooooohn!!  
GG: john john john  
GG: john!  
EB: i'm here, i'm here jeez jade!  
GG: hehe good! :)   
GG: i was talking to the others about a movie night this weekend!

Oh. Shit, you _love_ movie nights!

EB: uhm what day?  
EB: because i kinda have a deal saturday.  
GG: its friday!  
GG: with who? :o  
EB: vriska.  
GG: oh  
GG: .......  
GG: hey john why dont you invite vriska to our movienight?  
EB: really?  
GG: yeah you wanted us to meet her right?  
GG: and to be honest i think wed all like to meet her too!

You can't help but smile a little. Now that you think about it, no one else but Vriska knows that you got lenses now. Friday would be a great day to show them your new self _and_ to introduce them to Vriska. Or rather introduce Vriska to them. 

EB: i'll ask her!

You switch back to your conversation with the wall of blue text. Oh, shoot, you forgot to answer her question, and there's some messages waiting for you. 

AG: So what about those lenses, good enough?  
AG: John?  
AG: Helloooooooo????????

You might think that Vriska isn't a very patient type. 

EB: sorry, sorry, i'm here!  
EB: i'm not wearing the lenses right now, but i'm definitly happy that i decided to do this.  
EB: it's better than dealing with the glasses that's for sure!  
AG: Alright that's good to know.  
EB: also, i was wondering about a thing.  
AG: Yes?  
EB: my friends are planning a movienight this friday, and i know that we're planning that pokernight saturday, but i was just wondering if you'd like to come? if you don't have anything else to do.

You're waiting for her reply, that takes a little while. You suppose she's thinking it through, wondering if she has time. 

AG: Hmmmmmmmm. I don't have anything else to do, so I guess it shouldn't be any problem.  
EB: great so you'll come?  
AG: Sure! Why not.

You grin widely at the screen, before returning to Jade's chat.

EB: she'll come!  
GG: great!!

You think that your friends can get along with her pretty well.


End file.
